Ballad of Big Boss Briggs (A Briggs Striker)

“Ballad of Big Boss Briggs” Sheet Music (pdf).
“Ballad of Big Boss Briggs” Karaoke (midi with lyrics).

Lyrics: A Briggs Striker.
Tune: “King of Borneo.”


Oh, Walter Briggs came home one night
As rich as he could be.
He saw a letter on his plate
Where his meal ought to be.

“My dear wife, my darling wife,
My loving wife,” said he.
What is that upon my plate
Where my meal ought to be?”

“You big boob; you silly ass;
You lazy bum,” said she.
“That is a telegram,
As any fool can see.”

So W. B. opened it.
And this is what he read:
“Six thousand men have left the pen
And now production’s dead.”

“My dear wife, my darling wife,
My loving wife,” said he.
“What can this wire really mean
That Henry sent to me?”

“You big boob; you silly ass;
You lazy bum,” said she.
“It simply means your men are on strike,
As sore as they can be.”

So Big Boss Briggs, he took a plane
Up from the sunny South,
And when he saw that picket line,
He opened wide his mouth:

“Oh my, oh me, what shall I say?
These slaves want higher pay,
But I shall see Judge Connolly
And General Henry.”

He cut “dead time” with reason and rime;
He gave the big boys hell,
For Henry Ford, the Auto Lord,
His dollars and cents do tell.

Now Big Boss Briggs, oh, how he jigs,
He and his henchmen three:
“Heine” Hund and Connolly
And Jacob Spolansky.

They called their dicks with riot sticks;
Police with tear gas, too.
But the men were on to their dirty tricks,
For they were nothing new.

Each paper tries to spread its lies,
But the strikers hold their line.
They organize for they are wise:
Their union will be fine.

Then they’ll grab each lousy scab;
They’ll kick them in the pants.
And Big Boss Briggs and his stooling pigs,
Oh, watch how they will dance!

Now Walter Briggs comes home at night
As sore as he can be.
“Those workers fight with all their might.
They will wreck my factory.”

“My dear wife, my darling wife,
I have got an awful pain.
My head aches; my belly aches.
They are driving me insane.”

“You big boob; you silly ass;
You lazy bum,” said she.
“If you’ll give into the strikers’ demands,
You’ll keep your sanity.”


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